"How to Start Figuring Out If You Want to Have Kids": Ann Talks to Lifehacker.com

This wonderful Washington Post article has created a lot of opportunities to share my message with other media outlets and podcasts — more on that in the months to come — and the first person to contact me was Aimée Lutkin of Lifehacker.com.

She had a super question from her Lifehacker readers: “How do you start figuring out if you want to have kids?”

Starting is often the hardest part, isn’t it?

I gave Aimée three tips to starting this process if you’re stuck in indecision, as well as the following advice:

The biggest issue is trying to figure out what you want and what you’re going to do at the same time. The two have to be separated. The decision has to be put on hold while you spend time discovering your desire.

Below is an excerpt and a link to the full article: 

How to Start Figuring Out if You Want to Have Kids

By Aimée Lutkin

Being able to make an active decision to have or not have kids is an enormous privilege. It can also be one of the most difficult decisions you make. Ann Davidman is a marriage and family therapist who works as a “Motherhood Clarity Mentor” for people struggling with this choice, and she shared some of her tips on the process with Lifehacker.

The Washington Post recently interviewed Davidman and other therapists working in the same arena, a well as clients who felt that they made peace with their decision after seeking therapy. Davidman has an extensive process she takes clients through, and the book she co-authored with therapist Denise L. Carlini called Motherhood — Is It for Me? Your Step-By-Step Guide to Clarity, leads readers through 12 weeks of exercises. 

In an email to Lifehacker, Davidman warns that the decision is never simple, and the exercises she’s designed are meant to build on one another. But she has a few tips for how people begin to approach their choice for anyone who has begun to ask themselves if having kids is right for them. (Click to continue reading.)